Oh my god

Just got a completely random call. Always a shock when my phone rings. Who'd want to talk to me?!. Got a friend coming round, with the boyfriend and the tag-along. Why did I say yes>?!!! I cant cope with that. I should have said just her. She said something about a number plate. Got a really bad feeling somethings going on. Have they crashed? Are they hurt? Have I done something wrong? Scared of them coming and seeing me. I am acting weird. What if something bads happened and the police turn up? What if she is cross with me for not being in touch for so long? What if they want to stay and I cant say no. I will have to say no. im just too panicky. They will make a mess. I will have to talk to them. I will have to offer them a cup of tea, and they will see what a fumbling, shaky mess I am. Its gone 9pm at night…is it a bit rude to call at this time and announce that you are coming over with your boyfriend and tag-along, having not spoken in months? Or is that acceptable when it comes to your friends? Am I being unreasonable or just a grumpy mad cat lady? I think I am thinking too much. She is atleast. Shouting inside my head. Leave me alone!!

I love my friends really.

They've gone. I survived. Decided it was nice of them to pop in. nothing urgent had happened. I answered the door in my pyjamas, looking like crap I expect, nackered. They came in, took over the lounge, started humping eachother and hitting each other. They are so mature. Entertaining though, cheered me up a bit. Got a bit offended when chris started sticking his finger up Ernies bum, told him to stop. He is like a 6 year old. constantly pulls moonies and wants to wave his willy around. Squeakers is much the same, although 35 years old. But Meg is my friend, and i love her a lot, so I have to accept her senior boy friend who isnt the sharpest tool in the box. And they do make a sweet couple. And chris, the tag a long. Who is actually quite sweet, some might say he is a little bit ‘special’. But, these are my mates, and they make me giggle, so I cant complain. They are sweet, if a little bit clueless to some of the real despair and struggles of life.

I said sorry for not having been in touch. Said I’ve not been feeling well, not coping too well either. Meg said ‘aww’. I like it that she doesn’t ask questions. Chris asked if I am a psycho, I said a little bit he said that’s ok he understands because he had a ‘funny 5 minutes’ earlier too... A funny bunch. I fit right in. Outstayed their welcome a bit, but did bring a refreshing, carefree, child like mood with them. Sort of wish I could be like that. But unfortunately I over think and watch the news and tie myself in knots.....God i really panicked when they were coming! No harm done though. And can breathe now they are gone.

Meg, I love u by the way!